Traveling As a Couple

As they say.. couples who travel together, stay together. They’ve also said that you should travel with someone before you marry them. Traveling as a couple will be a test of your relationship and can help you discover if you’re truly a match.

My husband and I have spent thousands of hours traveling together, and it hasn’t always been pretty. We’ve had our fights (quite a few actually) but we’ve also had some of the best times of our lives. There will always be ups and downs but if you put in just a little extra effort, you and your partner will be fine. Here are our 11 secrets for how to stay sane when traveling as a couple, coming from a couple who has traveled together for more than five years now!

Traveling As a Couple – What to Do

Have Some Alone Time

When you travel with your partner you tend to spend every waking moment together. This is the quickest way to get on each other’s nerves. Make sure you take some time for yourself, allow yourself a chance to breathe, refocus, and reset.

Go With the Flow

As much as I love to have everything planned out ahead of time, I also realize that not everything will always go according to plan. And that’s okay. I still usually make a list of things to do on each day of a trip but if we miss a thing or two, or if we decide to do something totally different, it’s not a problem. You have to be okay with everything not going exactly how you want it to.

Split Travel Responsibilities

Trust me, having a designated person to keep track of the passports will save a lot of unnecessary “No, I don’t have them, I thought you had them!” arguments. Agree ahead of time who will be in charge of what.

Take Turns Deciding Where to Eat

Everybody has been there. The dreaded, “I don’t know, you choose”. Taking turns picking where/what to eat for each meal can help avoid that argument, and keep everyone satisfied. Didn’t like what your partner chose for lunch? Guess what, that’s fine because dinner is all you!

Don’t Expect Every Trip to Be Romantic, Just Because You’re Traveling as a Couple

Not every trip together will be a honeymoon. Don’t get me wrong, you can totally have a completely romantic week away in the mountains, but sometimes your destination or planned activities are just not romantic. Doing a lot of hiking where you’re going? Camping? You’ll be hot and sweaty, but not in a good way. More in the ‘I’m exhausted and I need a shower’ way. And that’s okay.

Make Time For a Date Night

Yes, I know I said that not every trip will be romantic, and it doesn’t have to be. But you still should set aside at least one night out of your trip to have a date night like you would at home. Besides, date nights are so much more fun when you’re in a new place together trying something new.

Acknowledge When There’s a Problem

The first big trip that my husband and I took together was a 3-week trip traveling all over Europe and Africa. There were times when both of us would get super grumpy (lack of sleep, obvs) but we found a way to get past it.

We would simply stop what we were doing and say “hey, we’re in Paris” or “we’re in Spain right now”. It was our way of saying “hey, I know you’re annoyed but look where we are. Let’s forget about that and enjoy our time here”. It was kind of like a mini wake up call, and for us, it worked every time. We were able to snap out of it and focus on what mattered because whatever we were annoyed about wasn’t important anyway.

If you just completely ignore the fact that your partner is annoyed (or being annoying) I can guarantee it will just continue to get worse. You’ll get mad that they’re mad, which will make them even more mad, and it’s just a never-ending cycle. Take that pause. Remember why you’re there. If it’s a serious issue, have a serious talk about it. If it’s something silly, laugh about it together. And enjoy making these memories together.

Be Intimate

The chance for some excitement and quality time together can give a much-needed boost to your relationship, and getting out of your boring day-to-day routine can be much needed.

Being in a fresh, new environment with the opportunity to spend some uninterrupted time together can be just what your relationship needs. Spending the day exploring, watching the sunset together, and then heading back to your hotel room with the nice spa bath and a bottle of wine might be just the push you need to indulge in a night of romance.

Traveling As a Couple – What Not to Do

Overpack

Navigating your way through the airport in a foreign country can be stressful enough as it is, you don’t need the hassle of hauling around 3 extra heavy suitcases, a backpack, a purse and a duffel bag making it any worse than it already is. You will get frustrated. Your partner will get frustrated. It will cause tension. Not to mention if your luggage happens to get lost. Then what? Whose fault is that? Do your best to always pack a carry-on only. I know it’s hard, trust me, but it can save you SO much trouble!

Forget to Compromise

My husband and I both hate the middle seat on airplanes (as everyone does) but I love the window seat and he loves the aisle seat. Seeing as we never actually pay to select our seat when we fly (what can I say, we’re cheap), we inevitably will end up with one or the other and one of us will be stuck in the middle. We agreed pretty early on that if one of the seats is a window, I get it. If one is an aisle, he gets it. The other gets the middle. It keeps us from arguing over something as unimportant as an airplane seat.

Be Selfish

When you’re planning a trip together you have to plan things that will interest both of you. If your partner hates museums, don’t make a trip to every museum in the city just because that’s what you want to do. There needs to be an equal amount of activities that will make you both happy. Focus on doing the things that you both enjoy.

The Perks of Traveling As a Couple

You’ll Have Awesome New Stories to Tell

One of the best things about traveling together is that you’re creating amazing lifelong memories along the way. We’ll always remember the time we hiked the Stairway to Heaven together. The time we watched the sunset from the edge of a cliff in Greece. And the time we were running through the streets of Moscow like madmen, about to miss our flight.

These are the things we love to talk about and that we most definitely will share with our kids and grandkids one day.

It Will Bring You Closer

Nothing helps you bond quite like having amazing life experiences together. It’s an amazing feeling knowing that your partner was the one that joined you for a night in at the hotel with a bottle of wine in Paris. They were the one holding you during that sunset in Thailand, the sunrise in Greece. They were the one laughing with you when you missed your flight back home from Hawaii.

Traveling together will bring many good times as well as bad. It will force you to put in the work and grow together as a couple. Sharing moments whether big or small will inevitably bring the two of you closer. It’s a great chance to focus solely on each other instead of what’s going on with work, friends, or family.

There Are Fewer Distractions

At home it’s much too easy to get stuck in a boring routine of going to work, coming home, and burying your face in your phone. You’ll order takeout, turn on Netflix, and scroll through Facebook for the rest of the night. Only to wake up and do it all over again the next day.

When you spend the day traveling and getting away from not only your surroundings but your daily routine, you can focus more on each other. When you’re out exploring a new city together you’re much less likely to have your face buried in your phone all day than if you were just having a chill day at home.

Make it a point to put your phones (or iPads or laptops) away and just enjoy each other’s company for a while.

You Will Fight.. and Make Up

When you’re together 24/7, sometimes cramped together in tiny hotel rooms, you’re bound to get on each other’s nerves at some point. Someone will forget something, you’ll get lost, and let’s not forget the jet lag and complete lack of sleep.

So yes, you will fight. But at the end of the day you get to make up, move on, and feel even closer than you ever were before. You’re likely to make up quicker on vacation than you would at home because you’ve got things to do, places to see, memories to make.

What are some of your best tips for traveling as a couple? Share them in a comment below!

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Don’t forget to check out these other posts:

• A Sunrise Paris Proposal
• The Best Airbnb’s Around the World
• Road Trip Essentials and Tips
• How to Avoid Looking Like an American Tourist